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Submitted by DakotaLegal on
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Submitted by DakotaLegal on
Divorce, especially involving custody, is a big question, and means it's easy to feel overwhelmed. The good part is that the legal system is actually set up in several stages, or steps, to try and keep it from overwhelming you. The first step is the question: do you have a lot of things you’re fighting over? Unfortunately, Alabama does not have what’s called a simplified divorce process. In Alabama, there are now three no-fault grounds: (1) incompatibility, (2) what’s called “irretrievable breakdown” of marriage, and if there’s been (3) voluntary separation of a year or more. There are ten fault grounds, which include adultery, drug abuse, or spousal abuse. In a fault case, you would have to prove the fault occurred. There is possible low-cost legal divorce: http://www.alabamalegalhelp.org.
In terms of getting custody, having “fault” may (but does not always) have implications for being a fit parent too. But some fault grounds (such as adultery) don’t change fitness of parenting. Drug use or violence in the home does affect custody.
- A Divorce Is Not the Same Thing as Custody
Court judges have gotten better at knowing that people who fight over “things” (property, bank accounts, homes, property, and debts) are not necessarily in the same position when it comes to children. There are several types of custody, but most courts prefer “joint custody.” http://www.divorceinfo.com/aljtcustodystatute.htm.
- Getting The Right Help
“Forms” are one important step. Though its’ not at all necessary for you to understand all of the forms, it is usually a good idea to get them as soon as you can. Here is a link for forms you’ll need, such as for child custody: http://eforms.alacourt.gov/default.aspx. You may begin the process by talking with a court clerk, who will tell you they can’t gibe you any legal advice…but they can answer basic questions, such as whether you have completely filled out the forms.
Courts also encourage couples to mediate and reach decisions outside of court. This not only saves time, but also can benefit a child by decreasing conflicts between the parents. You might study the process of what goes into classes that help your child in a stressful time. Eventually, the court will require you to attend some classes about divorce and its effect on kids: http://parentclass.net/Parenting_Classes/Alabama-Parenting-Classes.html. Learning more also helps demonstrate your willingness to make good decisions for your family.
There are also several types of child custody in Alabama, and you should start thinking about which type of custody seems the best (or worst) in your case, and begin to document your arguments for the type of custody you will ask for. Most parents want a sort of joint custody, but try to get primary physical or legal custody of the child. This can recognize that one parent usually has the most time and ability to have the kids most of the time.
- Parenting Studies & Skills
You didn’t say, whether you are the mom or dad. This shouldn’t make any difference, in theory, but the reality is different. Most men, once divorce is filed, move from the home where the child is living, which hurts their later claim for custody. That’s good for the mom’s custody claim but bad for the dad. Some experts argue that kids of the same sex as the parent benefit from physical custody being with that parent. Let’s talk about idea of what’s legally bets for the kids next. You will want to prepare for a likely parenting evolution, to be used if you cannot agree to custody.
- The “Best Interests” Of Your Children
Some people talk about “winning” a custody case. You will find that being awarded custody is not viewed the same way. The focus is not supposed to be on winning or losing, but on what’s “in the best interests of the child.” There are child care handbooks that judges are very familiar with…it won’t hurt for you to know them, too. Especially, look at Alabama’s home visit rules: http://www.childwelfare.gov/systemwide/laws_policies/statutes/homestudyreqs.pdf .
At some point, if you cannot reach an agreement about custody with the other parent, there will almost surely be a home visit to see how you interact and parent. One big mistake some parents make is to try and get the kids to “take sides.” Interfering with a child’s natural love and affection toward the other parent is one of the ways some good parents hurt their case fro custody.
Divorce, especially involving custody, is a big question, and means it's easy to feel overwhelmed. The good part is that the legal system is actually set up in several stages, or steps, to try and keep it from overwhelming you. The first step is the question: do you have a lot of things you’re fighting over? Unfortunately, Alabama does not have what’s called a simplified divorce process. In Alabama, there are now three no-fault grounds: (1) incompatibility, (2) what’s called “irretrievable breakdown” of marriage, and if there’s been (3) voluntary separation of a year or more. There are ten fault grounds, which include adultery, drug abuse, or spousal abuse. In a fault case, you would have to prove the fault occurred. There is possible low-cost legal divorce: http://www.alabamalegalhelp.org.
In terms of getting custody, having “fault” may (but does not always) have implications for being a fit parent too. But some fault grounds (such as adultery) don’t change fitness of parenting. Drug use or violence in the home does affect custody.
Court judges have gotten better at knowing that people who fight over “things” (property, bank accounts, homes, property, and debts) are not necessarily in the same position when it comes to children. There are several types of custody, but most courts prefer “joint custody.” http://www.divorceinfo.com/aljtcustodystatute.htm.
“Forms” are one important step. Though its’ not at all necessary for you to understand all of the forms, it is usually a good idea to get them as soon as you can. Here is a link for forms you’ll need, such as for child custody: http://eforms.alacourt.gov/default.aspx. You may begin the process by talking with a court clerk, who will tell you they can’t gibe you any legal advice…but they can answer basic questions, such as whether you have completely filled out the forms.
Courts also encourage couples to mediate and reach decisions outside of court. This not only saves time, but also can benefit a child by decreasing conflicts between the parents. You might study the process of what goes into classes that help your child in a stressful time. Eventually, the court will require you to attend some classes about divorce and its effect on kids: http://parentclass.net/Parenting_Classes/Alabama-Parenting-Classes.html. Learning more also helps demonstrate your willingness to make good decisions for your family.
There are also several types of child custody in Alabama, and you should start thinking about which type of custody seems the best (or worst) in your case, and begin to document your arguments for the type of custody you will ask for. Most parents want a sort of joint custody, but try to get primary physical or legal custody of the child. This can recognize that one parent usually has the most time and ability to have the kids most of the time.
You didn’t say, whether you are the mom or dad. This shouldn’t make any difference, in theory, but the reality is different. Most men, once divorce is filed, move from the home where the child is living, which hurts their later claim for custody. That’s good for the mom’s custody claim but bad for the dad. Some experts argue that kids of the same sex as the parent benefit from physical custody being with that parent. Let’s talk about idea of what’s legally bets for the kids next. You will want to prepare for a likely parenting evolution, to be used if you cannot agree to custody.
Some people talk about “winning” a custody case. You will find that being awarded custody is not viewed the same way. The focus is not supposed to be on winning or losing, but on what’s “in the best interests of the child.” There are child care handbooks that judges are very familiar with…it won’t hurt for you to know them, too. Especially, look at Alabama’s home visit rules: http://www.childwelfare.gov/systemwide/laws_policies/statutes/homestudyreqs.pdf .
At some point, if you cannot reach an agreement about custody with the other parent, there will almost surely be a home visit to see how you interact and parent. One big mistake some parents make is to try and get the kids to “take sides.” Interfering with a child’s natural love and affection toward the other parent is one of the ways some good parents hurt their case fro custody.